In the survey conducted in February 2010 by the Psychological and Pedagogical Counseling Centre, 5,417 students from primary, lower-secondary and upper-secondary schools took part. The largest group consisted of students from Bolesławiec. According to the survey, almost 75% of students experience violence from a schoolmate, while 37% of respondents admit that they themselves are aggressive. The most common form of aggression is verbal violence (60%). The rate of violence experienced from teachers and other adults at school is also alarming. As many as 16% of respondents pointed to it.
All it takes is for you to say “stupid” or look at someone the wrong way…
All it takes is calling a schoolmate stupid, and you may get hit. Children respond to insults by kicking, pushing, punching or spitting. They do it during breaks, and when they see a teacher, they stop so they will not be punished. – Children often fight – says ten-year-old Ania, a fourth-grader as of September. – They play, for example, tag. Suddenly one child pushes another, even accidentally, and then the child who was pushed retaliates with a kick or a punch. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a boy or a girl.
A student at one of the secondary schools describes how she beat up a classmate because the girl looked at her the wrong way. – My father taught us to fight at home – says the girl. – I’m his only daughter. My father taught me how to hit a man in his weak spots. How to kick a guy, how to punch him. The girl I beat up was such a stupid blonde, flat as a board. She had something against me, some stupid attitude. I had nothing against her. I went over to ask what her problem was. She replied that the faces she was making were not directed at me. I didn’t believe her because I was sitting on a bench at the time. I said, “What are you staring at, you slut?”, and she snorted something. Then I grabbed her by the hair, slapped her, grabbed her by the hair a second time and kneed her, then pinned her to the ground. My father taught me not to let anyone push me around.
When asked why they are aggressive and want to respond violently to situations they find unpleasant, her friends answer that this is simply how they are. – We’re just aggressive – says one of the seventeen-year-olds questioned. – When someone says something inappropriate to us, something we don’t want to hear, this anger awakens inside us.
The school psychologist explains such behaviour as an inability to cope with emotions—both positive and negative—and as repetition of behaviour learned at home. In these children’s homes, hitting, shouting and insulting one another are common. The children therefore respond with aggression disproportionate to another person’s behaviour. They may strike out because they fear ridicule, in response to criticism from classmates, or because of intolerance or rivalry.
Organised fights in Waryński Park and at the playground on Łukasiewicza Street
Children also like to insult one another, and an insult can likewise get you hit. They call one another fatsoes, skinny people, four-eyes, filthy, and gays (a strongly offensive term, although commonly considered correct when referring to homosexual men). Children also threaten to beat up a schoolmate after school. There is aggressive rivalry between classes and even schools. One mother told us that students from a lower-secondary school in Bolesławiec meet for regular fights in Waryński Park and at the playground on Łukasiewicza Street. The fights take place in complete secrecy from adults.
The mother who told us this story learned about it at a parents’ meeting at the school. Helpless teachers asked the parents for help. It turned out that lower-secondary students arrange fights with one another. Representatives of some schools fight representatives of others. The fights have a regular audience. – It looks like this: suddenly a swarm of kids comes along—that’s the audience – explains the mother of one student. – Children talk about a situation in which several girls from another lower-secondary school wanted to drag one of the students into such a fight during a break. Someone intervened and stopped it. Some children skip school to turn up for so-called arranged fights—fights scheduled for a specific time.
The problem is complicated, and the perpetrators are difficult to identify. The fights involve arranging a date and time for the combatants. Boys, but also girls, fight over various matters. Most often, however, it is about gaining leadership in a group, showing off, sometimes revenge or resentment. Someone may look at another person badly, act superior, or belong to a hated class or even school. – The worst are those who arrange these fights and then merely watch them – says one of the lower-secondary school teachers. – The organisers always make sure there is an audience and want it to be a spectacle. They also incite the fight, challenge the other children’s pride, saying, “If you don’t fight, you’re a coward,” or threatening them. Sometimes they also make those who refuse to fight pay.
The fights are sometimes recorded on mobile phones and then sent to friends. – We even confiscated one such video once – says the teacher. – But both the participants and the spectators had hoods over their heads, making identification impossible. Those who merely watch are most to blame. They are the real problem. They actually make sure the fight is a spectacle, attractive, and often record the fights as well. Most often these are fights for fun, but one moment is enough for the situation to get out of the children’s control.
According to teachers, this phenomenon is marginal and extremely difficult to control. Fights are arranged throughout the year, but most occur at the beginning of the school year, when some groups gain leadership and some individuals establish their position in a new school.
Caught in the web of aggression
A new form of public ridicule or humiliation has also appeared. It is cyberbullying. Young people record themselves on mobile phones in embarrassing and intimate situations—when they are drunk or during sexual situations—and post the videos online or forward them to friends’ phones. They send offensive text messages or make insulting, anonymous posts on various internet forums.
A notorious case in Bolesławiec involved a doctored video posted online, on YouTube. It showed photographs of the school buildings on Komuny Paryskiej Street and captions praising the institution. Two controversial scenes were inserted into the material. The first depicted simulated oral sex; in the second, a masked boy ran into a classroom and exposed himself. The headmistress, teachers and students from the school shown had to explain for a long time that the controversial scenes had not been filmed at their institution.
– It was done out of stupidity – explained Teresa Rudzińska, a school counsellor, on the programme “Into the Light of Day”. – Young people do not realise the consequences or that this is a crime. The perpetrator wants to cause trouble because they think they are anonymous. They hurt someone without facing immediate or direct consequences for their actions. Of course, it is easy to find out who posted something on a forum or sent a text message and punish them. Young people should be informed about this preventively. They should also be made aware of the feelings such attacks on the internet cause in others. The best approach is to develop empathy in children—the ability to understand other people’s feelings.
Were children better behaved in the past?
Leokadia, a teacher from a small rural school with 30 years of experience, now retired, recalls the beginnings of her career. – When I started working in the late 1960s, children had similar problems at school, but reacted to them differently – the teacher recalls. – They were sometimes naughty, teased one another and called one another names. It was always more difficult for a child who stood out from the others in some way. They called one another names and mocked each other. But they did not have the same spitefulness and ferocity as today. Children also listened to the teacher. They would not dare talk back and carried out her instructions. I remember demanding a notebook from a boy, and he did not have it with him. I was young and just starting my career. Today, probably no one would listen to me—would simply blow me off, as they say. The boy was in sixth grade. He asked whether he could go home to get the notebook because he lived across the street. I could watch him from the classroom window. I agreed, and to my horror, a few minutes later I saw him drive his father’s tractor out of the yard. He was going to the shop to buy a notebook because he did not have one at home. Today this story is an anecdote – the teacher concludes – but it shows how children listened. The teacher ordered him to bring a notebook, so most likely his parents themselves sent their son to the shop by tractor to carry out the teacher’s instruction and bring the notebook to class.
Another teacher with many years of experience also stresses that in the past parents were more willing to cooperate with the school and the teacher. They were more willing to do something for the institution their child attended. Today, a young teacher from another rural school complains that working with some parents is very difficult. – Parents can shout at the teacher in front of their child for assigning too much homework and leaving the child no time to play – she says of her experience. – The most aggressive ones even write complaints to the Ministry of Education. They undermine authority and question the way lessons are taught. They believe they know better. Sometimes they expect more from their child than the child is capable of. They are not satisfied with a good grade of three; they accept only fives. They do not see the reason for the grades in the child’s abilities. The teacher is to blame, because, in their view, they cannot teach the little genius.
Teachers with several decades of experience remember when young people began to change. – Economic rivalry was the first thing to become visible – recalls Leokadia. – Children whose parents began travelling abroad, most often to Germany, bragged about new things, toys and school supplies. Poorer or merely less well-off students felt inferior. They were mocked or simply envied their classmates, and various conflicts began to arise as a result.
– In the 1990s, “euro-orphans” appeared – says an employee of a social welfare centre. – Children were raised, for example, by grandparents who could not cope with an adolescent or lacked authority with the child. Absent parents appeared briefly and tried to control their son or daughter with gifts or shouting. This caused the children to become restless, quarrelsome, lost, and susceptible to the influence of peers rather than adults.
The Harsh Teacher
Another problem is the large percentage of students (16%) who identify teachers as a source of aggression. – Teachers have many ways of humiliating a student – says a teacher who wishes to remain anonymous. – Most often they simply do not respect children. This is not the norm, but it happens that they address them brusquely or arrogantly, or even mock them. I have often heard colleagues tell female students that they were dressed like women from the streets. “You sheep,” “idiot,” “stupid,” or “you moron” often come from a teacher’s mouth. Most often, however, form teachers disregard students’ problems or fail to notice them amid the pressure of work and responsibilities.
Teachers defend themselves by saying that young people really are difficult. To cover the material, one needs peace and quiet in class. Requests and persuasion do not always work. One has to shout or impose some kind of punishment. – What should you do in a classroom when a child throws paper at the teacher, insults and mocks them, and does not respond to any reprimand? – asks another teacher who also requested anonymity. – Sometimes lower-secondary schools create a class made up entirely of students who are quarrelsome. And the headteacher does it deliberately. They remove troublesome children from different classes and instead create some kind of ghetto, a class that teachers are afraid to enter.
Some teachers cope better in such a class, others worse, and still others cannot cope at all. Students immediately sense such a teacher. – I remember from lower-secondary school that we took it as a matter of honour to make a teacher cry – says a former student. – For example, we threw sanitary pads and tampons at teachers. Clean ones, of course – she adds.
How can violence at school be prevented?
Violence at school begins in the first grade. Its greatest increase is observed in lower-secondary school. Later, children mature and become gentler. The highest percentage of students who have not experienced violence (51.4%) are students at upper-secondary schools. About 60% of young people say they would like to give up aggression as a way of resolving conflicts. Lower-secondary students make up the largest group among them—nearly 70%.
To begin the process of preventing violence at school, as many as three environments must be brought together: children, the school and the family. Parents should be shown how to replace aggressive behaviour. They should even be made aware of what constitutes such behaviour. An example might be saying to a child, “I’ll kill you in a minute”—seemingly harmless. This is verbal aggression in its purest form, telling the child that living with them is impossible and that they are unwanted. The child then feels unwanted and unloved. The child should be apologised to for such words, so they know that the adult was wrong and does not really think that way about them. Psychologists call for parents’ parenting skills to be improved through participation in various classes. The ability to raise a child does not appear from nowhere with the birth of a child. It turns out that parents need to acquire at least basic knowledge about the developmental needs of children and young people.
Schools should provide students with individual, regular conversations with their form teacher. In one very difficult class, the situation improved because a new form teacher was able to warmly welcome a female student after her long absence from school. – I’m glad you’re back; it’s nice to see you – said the teacher, without criticising her absence. Students treated in this way receive the message that their form teacher cares about them, accepts them and likes them. Sometimes that alone is enough to build good relationships with students.
Individual therapy for a troubled student, conducted by a psychologist or school counsellor, would also be a good solution. It should focus on building faith in their own abilities, motivating them to study, setting near and distant goals, and teaching them to change antisocial behaviour into socially acceptable behaviour.
To implement these proposals, class sizes should be reduced and teachers supported. They too need professional psychological care. Developing teachers’ skills in working with students who present educational difficulties is essential, as is training form teachers in sociotherapy. A very good understanding of a student’s family environment is also important in order to understand the sources of the child’s inappropriate attitudes. – Violence has accompanied people forever – says Teresa Rudzińska, who also prepared the survey presentation. – We would all like to protect our children from it. Knowledge of what our children are like and what problems they have, together with creating the best possible relationships with them, is the beginning of efforts to minimise aggression at school, at home and in the immediate environment. Change also requires time and awareness that it is needed.
(report by Grażyna Hanaf)