Patrycja and Mariusz

Our story with foster care began in September 2021. However, much earlier, a great desire to be a large family was born in our hearts. When Marika—our biological daughter—was born, we very much wanted to “provide” her with a sibling, but it turned out that unfortunately I was unable to become pregnant again. My husband and I came to terms with this fact. As she grew up, our daughter Marika kept asking: “Mommy, Daddy, when will I have a little sister or brother?” It touched our hearts deeply and prompted us to open ourselves to adoption; at that point, we did not yet know about other forms of parenthood.

When we met Żaneta and Jarek, who are foster parents, we learned that it was possible to create a larger family in a way other than adoption. They introduced us to foster care. Thanks to Żaneta and Jarek, we also met Sister Agnieszka from a children’s home, who directed us to PCPR and Ms Alicja. We were informed how many children from our area need loving families that will provide them with immense love, patience and safety so that they can grow. That was also when we learned that a baby in our hospital was waiting for a family. This information touched our hearts so deeply that, in September 2021, six-month-old Kubuś came into our home, bringing even more joy and love with him. Providing foster care gives us enormous satisfaction, opens our hearts to even more love and joy, and helps us fulfil ourselves even more in our role as parents. The love that grows in a home spills over into everything around it. Watching the children open themselves to the world together, take joy from it and continually learn new things is wonderful. Most importantly, we can give those who need it a sense of safety, closeness and love, and provide them with the care they need so that they can grow and, in the future, become wonderful people.

Krzysztofa and Sebastian

Our adventure with foster care began on January 21, 2009, after we received a call from the Social Welfare Centre in Węgliniec saying that the parents of a minor girl, Gabriela, then a three-month-old baby, could not perform their parental duties because of alcohol abuse. When the child came into our care, we decided to undertake training for foster and adoptive families in Zgorzelec. My husband was Gabriela’s godfather, and this also guided our emotions and led us to take her into our home. My husband and I had four children of our own, so it was not an easy decision for us. The acclimatisation period went very well; our children quickly accepted the situation, and there were no major problems. Of course, there were difficult nights, and we had to get used to getting up at night again, but this period also passed successfully. Gabrysia was the centre of attention as the new little member of the family, and everyone devoted a great deal of interest to her. She grew up with our children like a normal sibling; there was no discrimination or jealousy toward her.

In May 2010, Gabriela’s sister Natalia was born. She remained in her parents’ care for two and a half years, after which the situation involving alcohol abuse by the girls’ biological parents repeated itself. Thus, in 2012, we received another call, this time from PCPR employees in Bolesławiec, who asked whether we would also be able to take two-and-a-half-year-old Natalia into our care. This time the decision was much more difficult because the girl needed psychological help. She was lost and frightened; she already knew who her mother and father were. After much consideration and conversations with my husband, we finally decided to take her into our care as well. It was difficult for us to make the decision, but we did not want the sisters to be separated. Natalia could not come to terms with being in a different place from one day to the next. She withdrew into herself. As time passed, things slowly began to settle. She began opening up to us and gradually establishing verbal relationships.

After many years, we are a large, loving family. Our efforts paid off. The girls grew into good students, and we have no problems with them. Our older children became parents, and we became grandparents. We are happy and proud of all our children.

Paula and Paweł

The decision to become foster parents was made while we were still engaged. Many years of volunteering at a children’s home, Paweł’s several-year stay there as a resident, contact with foster families who took in children we knew, frequent conversations, sharing life experiences, and the example of friends who took in six children all influenced our decision to become foster parents.

We have been a non-professional foster family for just under six months. We had not planned to take in children immediately after our wedding. However, our decision changed when we learned that two small girls we knew—sisters, three-year-old Elżbieta and two-year-old Patrycja—needed to be placed with a foster family. The girls came to us the day before our wedding. We were immensely happy that they could accompany us on such a special day, our wedding day. At first, it was not easy: new roles as wife and husband, and as foster mother and father. The girls quickly settled in with us. Love, stability, a sense of security, the time and attention devoted to them, and the warmth of a family home were helpful. All this enabled the girls to open up, trust us and smile more often. It gave them the conditions for proper development. We are happy about every moment together and about being able to watch how quickly they develop.

Our hearts are open, and we are ready to welcome more children. In a few days, a newborn will come to us directly from the hospital. Although separations are difficult and painful, we do not regret our decision. We want to give love and warmth where they have been lacking—even if only for a while. To share something the children have never experienced in life, because “it is more blessed to give than to receive…”

Dominika and Mariusz

We have been a foster family since 2015. Our daughter’s death motivated us to make this decision. We cared for her for 20 years. After she passed away, we decided to fill the emptiness she had left behind.

Our initial plan was adoption. After talking with the PCPR coordinators, we decided to become a foster family. Full of concerns related to the great responsibility and duties toward children who were strangers to us, we took this step. Our task is to give them a sense of security, support and a loving home, which leads to visible improvements in their behaviour, learning and self-confidence. What gives us the greatest happiness is seeing the children who come to us improve their self-esteem and mental state, and seeing them happy with us. During trips together, we are never bored. We make contacts, play together, fool around and talk. When the children are happy, so are we. Problems in a foster family are the same as in any biological family. We always have the support of PCPR. What is our answer to the question: why is it worth becoming a foster family? This work gives a great deal of satisfaction because we can help someone and our efforts to give children a normal home are not in vain. That is why we encourage everyone, both the brave and the less brave, to take in children and provide them with a safe, stable home where they will be happy. Children truly know how to show their gratitude.

Żaneta

Ever since I got married, I had always wanted to have a large family and many children. Unfortunately, I had only two sons, who are now adults.

In the meantime, I divorced my husband, but my desire to have a large family continued. My biological sons were already practically living separate lives. I increasingly often considered becoming a foster parent for a child in need. However, everyone advised me against it, saying that a single woman could not fulfil such a role. In the meantime, fate decided that I would go to work at a children’s home. There were fifteen children in my group, aged from 8 to 20. As the lead educator, I was responsible for three of them. The youngest was ill and presented educational difficulties. He needed more attention and care than the other children living with him in the children’s home.

Two years ago, I took the step that changed my entire life—my past, present and future. The boy in question had been discharged from hospital after routine examinations, and because I had a short holiday, I decided to take him on leave to the countryside, to my parents.

It turned out that the child immediately connected with them. He felt at home. Right away, he began calling them Grandma and Grandpa. My sons also excelled in the role of potential “older brothers.” However, I began to have mixed feelings and asked myself a million questions about whether I could really manage to raise another child—one who had additionally been hurt by his parents and was burdened with kidney disease. After returning from my holiday, I spoke honestly with my sons, and we unanimously concluded that ever since the boy had returned to the children’s home, things somehow felt sad and that, all in all, it had been better when he was with us. I then submitted the documents to PCPR in Bolesławiec, completed a foster-family course, and for almost two years have been a mother to a wonderful 11-year-old boy.

Looking back over these two years, would I change my decision? Never in my life! Quite the opposite. I am considering creating a safe and loving home for another child who has been hurt. Let us remember that love multiplies when it is shared.

Anna and Marcin

We have been a foster family for a fairly short time—only three months—but we are happy that we made this decision. Our little one’s smile and the joy he brings into our lives are invaluable. Why did we decide to do it? Because goodness and love multiply when shared. Children who enter foster families suffer the consequences of and pay for their parents’ irresponsible decisions. Let us not allow these fragile and defenceless beings, who have often experienced various kinds of harm, to go without love. These children do not need money, designer clothes or foreign holidays. The only thing they want is to be wanted and loved. Each of us can create a place where a child will feel safe, but above all, loved. It is enough to share our time and warmth, and the problems that may arise disappear. The greatest gift for another person is the gift of oneself.

Urszula and Leszek

Dear Future Foster Parents! My name is Urszula. Together with my husband Leszek, we have been a foster family for a boy named Klaudiusz for ten years, since December 2011. Before we decided to become foster parents, we visited a former school friend who ran a family children’s home for twelve children. From the moment we saw those cheerful, well-cared-for children in a home full of love and care, we also wanted to become such a family. We dreamed of becoming a professional foster family. However, life had other plans for us. The first step was enrolling in a course for foster families. The course took place once or twice a week. No one in our family or among our friends knew that we were taking such a course. We did not want anyone to advise us against it. During the course, we had to complete a three-day placement at a children’s home. We remember the first day exactly. We arrived a little confused and curious. That day, there were almost no children there, except for a few, because it was school time. The first child we saw was a tiny, delicate and beautiful boy. He stood by the wall and watched us. I approached him and asked, “What is your name?” The boy stood and looked at us with his lovely eyes without saying anything, and then one of the carers said that Klaudiusz, as he was called, was deaf. I wanted to take his hand, but he was distrustful. Only when my husband held out his hand did he go with us to look around the children’s home. From then on, he was with us all the time, especially with my husband, as I was looking after a little girl and other children. He became increasingly trusting and cheerful. That was when we understood that Klaudiusz had chosen us as his carers. Sometimes we could take Klaudiusz home for the weekend. Once, when we were taking the boy back to the children’s home, he cried terribly and asked us to stop. He showed that he wanted to go to our home, and then we decided that Klaudiusz would be the child who stayed with us. We stopped being afraid that we would not manage because he was a deaf boy with cerebral palsy. His gait was unsteady, and he could not sit still for long. He needed more attention; we had to take him to many doctors—a neurologist, endocrinologist and cardiologist. Over time, everything returned to normal. He stopped waking up screaming at night, wetting himself before going to preschool and a school for deaf children in Wrocław, and stiffening his arms so much that my husband and I had to dress him, because one person could not manage to dress a five-year-old boy. We remember his first Mother’s Day at school. Klaudiusz probably did not fully realise that we would come. He saw us in the hall and ran over quickly to hug us. Moments like that meant that we never regretted our decision to become a foster family. We treat him as our second son. Our biological son is Klaudiusz’s older brother. They get along very well. Szymon can make Klaudiusz do things such as helping with tidying up and using his mobile phone and computer wisely. Klaudiusz sometimes gets angry that he cannot use these things, but he understands that he is doing wrong and that his older brother is right. We have only one child in our foster family. You, Dear Parents, can take in more children and, at the same time, take on more responsibilities, but also experience more joy. Based on our observations, we can offer you a few useful pieces of advice. Fight for your children—the future children who will come to you. You will receive help from PCPR employees; they are kind, courteous people who are ready to help. They will visit you at home, as that is part of their work, but with prior notice. They organise courses for families and picnics in a pleasant atmosphere, for example on Foster Parenthood Day. Children’s home staff can also help you. Sometimes there will be people who openly say that you are doing this for additional financial benefits, but do not worry about it; always respond with a smile on your face.

Our deaf boy Klaudiusz now has two cochlear implants. Until then, he used hearing aids that did not improve his hearing, so we decided at all costs to try to restore his hearing, even though many people advised us against the operation. He is currently learning more words and is happy that he can pronounce more and more of them. He attends a school where he learns sign language. We also learned it, but only for a short time; now we study it on our own. We want Klaudiusz to hear and speak for his own safety.

Thanks to the family courses, we met another wonderful foster family. We have remained in contact ever since. We help, support and advise one another on various matters. People who decide to take the course are, as we have noticed, courageous people who have been through a great deal in life, but above all, they are people who want to give love to another person—to someone who needs that love most and is able to return it. Our now fifteen-year-old son, despite his age, can still cuddle and hug tightly. The opportunity to give another person love is a beautiful experience, and we wish everyone who decides to take a similar step courage and perseverance.

County:

Those considering becoming foster carers are invited to contact the staff of Powiatowe Centrum Pomocy Rodzinie w Bolesławcu:

  • by telephone at 75 612 17 81–89,
  • in person: at the Centre’s headquarters at pl. Marsz. J. Piłsudskiego 2 in Bolesławiec (the so-called round building).