Therapeutic Tales Develop a Child’s Potential | Kruszyn Workshops

Research into aggressive behaviour among children shows that the less a child understands and can name their emotions, the greater their problems with aggression or self-aggression. Tales have always taught us to live and feel better.

When a child behaves aggressively at school, for example by hitting a boy or girl classmate, they are most often told that they are naughty and that if they hit other children, nobody will like them.

The child will forever associate anger with something bad, because nobody asks why they hit someone. Perhaps it was self-defence, because they felt attacked and were helpless in the face of that attack. When asked why she had beaten her classmates, one girl replied that she did not know what else she could do to make the children stop making fun of her.
– If I had complained to the teacher – she told me – it would not have changed anything; they would have mocked me secretly, and the teacher cannot stop them. It was difficult to endure.

She felt her anger at the children who mocked her in her heart; that was also where her rebellion against her classmates’ unfair behaviour arose. Anger was a form of defending the boundaries of her dignity that had been violated. She did not have to hit anyone; she could have named her anger, connected with that feeling and discovered that her classmates were the aggressive ones, while she was only reacting to their aggression. They were the ones behaving badly. That moment of reflection could have saved the child from attacking others and, consequently, from being labelled a “difficult pupil”. But nobody had taught her how to name her feelings, and it was she who was judged naughty by the adults.

Another child, asked about the time when they had been angriest, described how the teacher had mocked their weakness in front of the entire class. This situation also ended with the child being called “difficult”. The child was surprised when they discovered who the aggressor had been. They understood that they were not difficult and had the right to become angry with the teacher in such a situation.

I do not dream of anything. I am not afraid of anything.

At workshops I conduct to promote my two therapeutic tales, I hear various stories from children about problems with emotions. Children who cannot name their emotions have another problem as well.

Six-, seven- and eight-year-olds say, “I have no dreams.” I ask whether they have never dreamed of anything. They have blank expressions and confirm: they have never desired anything. I am surprised. I ask further: “What about presents under the Christmas tree? Perhaps a dog or a cat, a hamster?” But most often there is no response. In such situations, the teacher usually says that the child is simply like that, that they do not even dream.

How can a therapeutic tale help?

We all want to have intelligent, ambitious children who cope perfectly in the world, obtain better professions and positions than we did, and earn plenty of money. It is a human desire for a child to have a better life than we did. Every parent has their own, appropriate plan for supporting their child’s future. However, they do not always realise that how a child finds their way in the world also depends on whether they know themselves, their emotions and their needs. Knowing what one wants makes it easier to reach for what one desires. The ability to overcome fears helps us get more out of life.

Garbuska is about parental love and fulfilling dreams

It promotes two of my tales. Garbuska is a tale about a very contemporary child raised according to the so-called “cold upbringing” model, without unnecessary words of love and without time being devoted to her; there are only demands. Unfortunately, in such a family, the only thing that grows on a child is a hump. The girl runs away from home with one mysterious suitcase, representing the potential that each of us receives from our parents.

During workshops promoting Garbuska at the primary school in Kruszyn, six-year-olds came up with the idea of drawing a machine for me that would fulfil dreams. The children had all sorts of ideas, and their dreams were simple: to have a dog, a hamster or lots of toys. The machine, full of buttons and mysterious switches, produced what the children wished for. Second-graders already dreamed of more complicated things. A nine-year-old boy revealed his dream to me: he would like to stop the whole world so that he could do whatever he wanted.

At the Garbuska workshops, children paint the colours of their emotions, having the opportunity to name what they feel and consider what colours love, anger, shame, joy and pride have. They create colourful collages on sheets of paper, amazed that the world of emotions is so colourful and rich. Some of them name their emotions for the first time, perhaps for the last time.

The Box Girl is about overcoming fear

The heroine of my second tale, The Box Girl, is the most fearful girl in the world. Out of fear, she shut herself inside a box, lost her name, and her fear was contagious. At the meetings, I talk with the children at length about what they are afraid of. Their fears are most often spiders, zombies, darkness and frightening characters from computer games. We discuss what the emotion of fear is in our lives, how we react to it, and whether it helps us or makes life more difficult.

After explaining how fear works, the children have an interesting art task. On a large sheet of grey paper, they create a “little person” and then cover it with drawings of their fears. The children tattoo the figure with spiders, mice, clowns, fractures, drunks and, sometimes, maths test grades—in other words, whatever they fear most; each fear “lives” in a different part of the body.

This simple activity makes children realise that fears arise in our heads, while physical reactions are felt in different parts of the body—most often in the stomach, which can ache from fear, but also in sweaty palms, legs that feel frozen, or shivers running down the back when the danger is still invisible. This is how we tame this difficult emotion.

Therapeutic-tale workshops in Kruszyn and at your school

I have visited several schools with my tales. Most recently, I met children from the primary school in Kruszyn. The meetings were organised by Grażyna Wężyk at the Municipal Library in Kruszyn. Thank you very much for the lovely welcome and help organising the activities. The children had a wonderful time, inspired me to try new things and told interesting stories. I would especially like to thank the teachers: Izabella Rydzak, Marzanna Gal, Justyna Jóźwa, Beata Chmielik, Jolanta Pańczak and Joanna Czaplicka. All photographs come from meetings with children from Kruszyn.

If you would like to organise such a free meeting with therapeutic tales and art-therapy workshops, please contact me. The meeting lasts about an hour and a half and consists of discussions, questions, painting and quizzes.