Being a husband means understanding nothing. It is drifting across an ocean of ignorance and wondering about the purpose of intelligent creams costing 600 zlotys for a tiny jar. Can an intelligent cream solve the mystery of what a wife wants from her husband?

Why do those women pick on them? After all, they sacrificed the most precious thing in the world for them, something whose value cannot be measured, and whose loss nothing can compensate for. And no love can soothe the pain and longing for what was lost.

For a husband is someone who has lost his freedom. His great-grandfather, grandfather and father fought for it. A man sucked it in with his mother’s milk, so thoroughly that not a drop was left for the little sister suckling at the same maternal breast.

Having sacrificed something so precious for the relationship, how can a husband understand what else his insatiable wife wants from him?

A husband without freedom is impaired, so he deserves rights and privileges like a disabled person. More gentleness, understanding and tolerance. This proud animal locked in a small family cage. This lion, this King of Beasts, enslaved by everyday life—suffers.

Being a husband is not merely such trivial matters as cooking meals, cleaning or changing the children’s diapers. It is sacrifice. It is renunciation. It is rape of a free, independent individual. It is humility before earthly vanity. It is a struggle for existence—whatever that may mean nowadays. Although there is no longer any need to obtain food by chasing it across savannas and through forests, earning money for the household is a titanic task, like hunting a mammoth with a small club once was.

Enormous responsibility, sacrifice, everyday heroism and no understanding from the one for whom the greatest sacrifice was made. Being a husband is undoubtedly a tragic experience in every man’s life.

Below, I present several answers to the question: “What does being a husband mean to you?” And once again I invite you to have fun guessing which of the men is a happily married man and which is a happy lifelong bachelor.

“It means nothing to me. I see it differently. Two people get married and, to me, that means being more of a partner, and also a father. The very phrase ‘being a husband’ means nothing to me.”
husband 37%
bachelor 63%
“I haven’t got the faintest idea. I don’t want to make anything up. I don’t know. I think that to a large extent it is a tiring duty. An obligation. With age, every day, I have less and less idea of what things should be like; certain typical definitions are slipping away from me. I don’t know.”
husband 42%
bachelor 58%
“To be a husband, you need to feel the need to start a family. The need to have children. That is the meaning of marriage.”
husband 58%
bachelor 42%
“A husband is the head of the family, someone who has authority in the family, someone strong, although he sometimes needs support and help. When someone decides to become a husband, he must be determined to stand by his partner for better or worse. Not turn away when things are bad. Spouses must accept each other’s flaws, behavior and views. They should live with dignity, behave properly toward each other and others, and enjoy every moment. Life is so short. He is a person who shows respect, but is also entitled to respect. A loving person, with passions, dreams and feelings, as well as flaws and virtues like every human being.”
husband 63%
bachelor 37%
“It is an enormous responsibility. A husband is the person at the helm who listens to his wife’s advice in order to steer the marriage well. The two are one, which is why they share their love, knowledge and wisdom. If one spouse is doing badly or well, the other experiences the same.”
husband 71%
bachelor 29%

Grażyna Hanaf