Are we courteous toward pregnant women or women with small children, older people and people with disabilities? We use public transport, observe drivers and stand in queues.
Culture is an indispensable element of the proper functioning of society. Society—that is, a group of people who inhabit a shared territory, follow uniform principles and bonds, and possess a shared cultural and religious heritage based on their living conditions.
The context of this article concerns the concept of culture as humanity’s heritage: establishing certain patterns, the ability to interact with people, behave appropriately, and show refinement, tact and social awareness.
Our cultural understanding unanimously supports giving priority to the aforementioned pregnant women, women with small children, older people and people with disabilities. So why do we so often encounter improper behaviour?
Here is a true-to-life story…
I will start with giving up seats on public transport. Travelling by bus to work, school or home, I see an older person using crutches boarding the bus. I am sitting somewhere far at the back. Near the entrance, however, there are two young people of middle-school age and one middle-aged man. Paying no attention to their surroundings, the teenagers sit staring at their smartphones, listening to music and probably surfing the Internet. The older man, lost in thought, stares straight ahead and mutters quietly to himself. The elderly woman looks around for a vacant seat—but unsuccessfully, as there are none.
I could not stand by and watch the situation, so I got up and invited the elderly lady to take my seat at the back. She politely declined because the distance proved too difficult to cover on a crowded bus. To make matters worse, the driver, hurrying to the next stop, set off abruptly. I approached the young people and asked them to give up their seats to the elderly woman. They both looked me up and down, pretending they had not understood what I had said. Seeing what was happening, the man stood up and led the older person to his seat. The young people immediately stood up, waited a moment and got off at the next stop. The conclusion is obvious—courtesy among young people is simply nonexistent…
Dear readers, try to give up your seats to older people and pregnant women. Sitting for this short while will do little for you, but a great deal for them. When you see such behaviour, do not be afraid to speak to the other person. Politely ask them to stand up and vacate the seat—even if that older woman appears, at first glance, to be very rude. She has lived through her best years; today she needs care and help, and you can show it through a simple act of social kindness.
Another situation: the rather common phenomenon of “fast and furious” drivers. While driving, they do not look at pedestrians—anything to reach their destination! It is quite widespread. Driver! Stop! Let pedestrians cross the road. Do not honk at older people and people with disabilities who have entered the roadway. Those few seconds you devote will make someone’s life easier, while making no difference to you.
The final aspect of (in)courteous behaviour I would like to address is queues in shops. Most supermarkets already have priority checkouts (for older people, people with disabilities and pregnant women), yet some people push ahead shamelessly in order to leave the shop quickly. Remember that, in the place of those who need assistance, you would not want to be treated this way. If you have the opportunity to let someone go ahead and help another person—do it and feel the satisfaction (a priceless feeling).
psychopedagogue, sociotherapist and trainer from Bolesławiec
Dawid Karol Kołodziej
https://psychopedagog.eu